Better Not To Be Born

Prafulla Kumar Mohanty

In glibtongued nonchalance almost every human, except a few (very), say life is such a difficult challenge, so hard, so nasty, brutish and short. Poets  in all languages and cultures sing of life  as futile time serving in a hell hole where even to breathe is a Herculean effort. The eighteen year old Chatterton, wrote a few insipid poems and killed himself saying: The world is too much for us. Despite the warranty of death, the inevitable end of life, people commit suicide. The Romans and the Japanese are famously suicidal. But Macbeth refused self-slaughter (why should I play the Roman fool ? As  long as I see heads before  me gashes would do better on them.) Some worthies who respect the cannons of the everlasting against self slaughter  desist the impulse. All these and many other vocables  which I don't wish to record for want of space  lead me to the question, is  life such a debatable proposition ! Man is born one day dies another day. Sunrise and sunset is a multi splendored procession of light , glory  rain, clouds, crimson to golden orange colour spectrum between dawn and dusk: The sun never stops, never falls on the ocean in disgust of repetitive boredom! Why then some men (women too)  cut untimely the journey with  morbid scissors? Is suicide so very attractive to engage human passion to fatal termination?

All sages, thinkers and wise men during the course of the relentless journey of the Homo (erectus) Sapiens have said life is God's greatest gift to man. A scientist, denying Darwin like, divine origin to life will at least credit it to nature. Man is a natural phenomenon with an unrechargeable life force. Life on earth is psychosocial energy which  achieves things by physical and mental work. At least man tries to survive the process by trying to wriggle out of his hunger, sickness, frustration, failures and other antipathies of nature - society by his native intelligence and physical energy. Why should he be afraid of the built in fears and  impediments  natural or self-caused and think of an escape route half way? When he succeeds he never pauses; he becomes a king, a godly  person, a warrior,  an inventor,  a scientist, innovator, writer, administrator, a saviour of life and also a fighter, a killer, a master political strategist and what not!! When he fails to climb the throne in the legitimate manner he invents devious ways, murderous short cuts and other  strategies which he himself would hate - only to succeed. Why  should then failures, defeat, disappointment, setbacks, penury or loss of honour and frustration lead him to the bare  bodkin? He sees the most beautiful roses rotting in a state of half bloom in a snow storm. Wanton children ruin many a  butterfly their  humming courtship; lightning strikes many towers to ignominious fall; many Ramas are exiled on coronation moments, Nelson Mandellas waste their manhood in dark cells: Do they all kill themselves? Does Sita jump into the nearest river after Laxman  left her in the trackless forest? She fought against  all odds with remarkable dignity. She was defamed as a  queen but she retained her feminine grace by silent non submission to calamity. She respected life and finally returned to her mother earth. All hungry men do not beg, they struggle for their bread.

Shall we then tentatively conclude that those who make peace with knife or poison are afraid of life? A moral coward strikes his head against temple walls; a shrunken soul writes homilies, "He who patiently wants  burden bears... is a king". Yes silent and unprotesting suffering is advocated  by many so called poets who depended on borrowed sustenance . But those who rushed out to meet headlong the bullets and bombs to save others are greater kings. Man has to choose between  worthless suffering and heroic death. But this death is not  self slaughter. If one makes a  sacrifice to save people, to make others feel reassured, is a higher soul. But one who withdraws from the performance stage of life into the dark wings is a sub man, less than human.

The suicide of Sushant Singh Rajput for me was a cowardly act. I have watched his career right from his Pavitra Rishta days. An actor, dancer and a good man, naturally ambitious.  He got a break in Bollywood, gained some reputation and also success. But he accepted his victimhood and put the rope around his neck in his lonely bedroom. What a shame! What a waste of human vitality! What an insult to his share of the life force! If people around you try to throttle your talents it means you are talented and a threat to the starkids who monopolize the industry.  And you yourself surrendered your talent to your victimhood. Amitabh Bachchan after his ABCL was gone but even with repeated failures at  the Box office did not feel defeated, did not surrender to the victimizers, did not beg for mercy from any powers - human or divine. He fought on with calm determination  for he had immense and unshakable faith in his talents. And look where he is today!

The greatness of man lies in steering the course of his life. He discriminates  between the raw and the cooked between dignity and ignominy. He fights not for survival alone, he fights to place himself on the pedestal of glory. What people say 'mental health', in my view is irrelevant unless it is a disease.  But those who take anti depressants and run to the head shrinkers are depersonalised by their own incomprehension of life and the human reality.  Man must know his own strength and weakness and choose his course. If he cannot climb to the top let him build a road around and walk. But if he cannot walk that is his funeral. Man chooses his destiny. He fights fate with his free will. If his life cannot accept his new failures, he is not human. All mental problems are egocentric. if the ego fails to perceive the challenges it is weak. And this weakness is to be overcome by more persuasive determination to win to conquer  and to strive to the epitonic limit of the nerves. If you can't nurse and nourish your nerves better not to be born.