Talaq

Prafulla Kumar Mohanty

If marriages are made in heaven, where are divorces made? Today people argue divorce is built into marriage like opposition to the Ruling group in a democracy. But all religions believe that marriage is a sacrament. A man and woman create an order of life. They create their personal world. The male and female are equal partners in the family and all rational constructs associated with it. But when the cementing factor which is love,weakens, things fall apart. But in Muslim marriages it was made so easy that divorce was almost a funny game. Say talaq three times and the woman has no place in her husband’s family. The responsibility of the children is  also on the wife. She has no claim on the property of her husband. No provision for alimony. And all this in the name of religion. The All India Muslim Personal law Board never bothered about the plight of woman. The women is always the second sex. Always unequal  to man. Always the victim of patriarchy.

 In India the patriarchal system has a long history. The Hindus too never respected woman as an equal partner in life. The daughter in the family is always meant for the 'other house.' She was not permitted to study the Vedas. She was denied education. Her lot was to keep the  home to please the husband and to bring up the children.The girl child was also discriminated against even by mothers at home. The male child will become a bread winner but the girl child has to be given away in marriage with a lot of  dowry. Although the Hindu Code Bill has given equal rights the  hindu woman is not given her due. But the hindu society is evolving and women are not considered playthings anymore.They are no more commodified.  But the psychic fixation that woman is the weaker sex and should not be trusted with responsibilities still continues in certain spheres, despite our efforts to educate and empower them.

But in India the so called muslim scholars and religious authorities justify tripple talaq and refuse to treat woman with respect.This tripple tataq business went to such a ridiculous extent that talaq could be given over the telephone or a whatsapp message. This 1400 year old practice has now been struck down as unconstitutional by the Supreme Court of India. Welcome.

But why should there be a divorce? Marriage is not a mere license for sex. It is a spiritual, if not legal, commitment to raise a family, create a personal world where both the spouses are equal partners. Whatever be the constraints - financial, temperamental or personality maladjustment – man can overcome, that’s why he is Man who aspires to be Homo Deus not dence. Ofcourse in case of death or terminal sickness, if the family cannot advance, divorce could be considered. Sexual delinquency, promiscuity and cheating on either side should also lead to divorce. But what is commonly said as incompatibility, in my view, is a personal inadequacy superimposed on the partner to bail out one's insolent ego. In cases where the spouses are both professionals, have their career ambitions, they must make adjustments in time management and mutual ego feeding. They must be proud of each other’s achievements instead of cowering under personality towers. Mutual trust and a determined approach to carve out a joyful arcade of relationship to show to the world that you can build a beautiful family as you have built your overarching careers will make you more successful specimens of humanity. It must, however, be admitted that in spite of efforts often marriages fail but divorce as the Muslim scriptures say is a sin. All religions dissuade; yet divorces happen.

Divorce breaks a family, causes a directional deviant often leading to pernicious perdition. Life becomes half lived. If the men and women are poor the children chase the mysteries of devilment. The society does not bother about half - lived failures. Governments try to rehabilitate them but a life has failed. A life could not fulfill its potential. I hold this against divorce. Tripple talaq was a man made monster causing a midstream disaster. But any talaq anywhere is inhuman and socially unacceptable. Men should overcome their patriarchy and respect woman as a beautiful unit of life. It should not go waste.